Praying For Those Who Prey

 When God Told Me to Pray for the Person Who Preyed on Me

 

Have you ever felt like God was asking too much?

Not "love your neighbor" too much. I'm talking about "pray for the person who intentionally tried to destroy your name" too much. Because I have.

 

There was a season when my family and I were walking through one of the hardest chapters of our lives. We were already carrying enough. We were grieving. Fighting battles people couldn't see. Trying to simply survive. Then someone decided that wasn't enough. They lied. They gossiped. They twisted the truth. They spoke on situations they knew absolutely nothing about. And somehow, the lies spread faster than the truth ever could.

 

I was hurt….NO... I was angry!

The kind of angry where your mind starts drafting responses before your feet even hit the floor in the morning. The hurt that has you pulling up screenshots of previous messages set to you and pulling pictures as well to humiliate…….. I was choosing violence. So, I did what a lot of us do when we're wounded.

I took it to social media. SMH! I KNOW I KNOW!

 

I didn't say everything I wanted to say because trust me... there was plenty left unsaid. But I said enough to let people know I had been wronged. Then conviction came.

That still, small voice wouldn't let me rest. I deleted the post.

 

I thought that was the lesson.

 

I was wrong.

 

The next morning, before the sun even had a chance to rise, the Holy Spirit woke me up with one clear instruction:

"Pray for them." Excuse me... what? Pray for... them? The person lying? The person gossiping? The person trying to dismantle my family's reputation while we were already bleeding? Surely You meant, "Pray that they stop."

Or maybe, "Pray that I expose them."

Or perhaps, "Pray that justice comes quickly."

 

No. Just... "Pray."

 

Can I be honest? I felt like God was playing in my face. I sat there crying.

Real tears. Not because I didn't know prayer worked... But because I didn't want it to work for them. Everything inside of me wanted accountability.

God wanted intercession. Those are not the same thing.

So I prayed. Not because I felt spiritual. Not because I suddenly liked them. Not because they apologized. I prayed because obedience mattered more than my feelings.

 

At first my prayers were short. Forced. Sometimes all I could manage was,

"Lord... bless them." Then I'd stop because my flesh wanted to argue with my own prayer. But day after day... Morning after morning...God kept calling me back.

Eventually I found myself praying for their peace.

Their healing, Their family, Their purpose, Their relationship with God. THAT BLESSINGS WOULD RUN THEM DOWN!

 

Somewhere in the middle of praying for them...

God started healing me.

That's what shocked me.

I thought the assignment was about changing them.

It was actually about freeing me.

Because bitterness is expensive.

It costs peace.

It costs sleep.

It costs joy.

It costs intimacy with God.

And the enemy doesn't care whether you're holding unforgiveness because you were right. He just wants you holding it. I also learned something else. There is a difference between people who pray...and people who become intercessors. Anyone can pray for people they love. Intercessors pray for people who wounded them.

 

Jesus prayed,

"Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do."

Stephen prayed while they were literally killing him.

THAT’S KINGDOM.

It's uncomfortable.

It's costly.

And if I'm honest...

It feels unfair. But the cross wasn't fair either…..

 

Today, I don't tell this story because I'm proud of how I handled it.

I tell it because I'm grateful God loved me enough to interrupt my flesh before my flesh interrupted my purpose. Sometimes God will ask you to pray for the very person who preyed on you. Not because they deserve it. But because your calling is bigger than your offense.

 

DO NOT MISUNDERSTAND ME……

Praying for someone doesn't mean you trust them again.

It doesn't mean you give them access again.

It doesn't mean there are no consequences.

Forgiveness doesn't erase wisdom.

You can release someone spiritually while maintaining healthy boundaries naturally.

Those two things can coexist.

 

Looking back, I realize God wasn't asking me to ignore what happened.

He was asking me not to become what happened. Because hurt people often become people who hurt people. But healed people become people who heal people.

So, if God ever wakes you up in the middle of the night and tells you to pray for someone who preyed on you...Don't be surprised if your tears become the very water He uses to grow something beautiful inside of you. It won't be easy.

You may even feel like He's playing in your face. But one day you'll realize He wasn't punishing you. He was protecting your heart.

 

And that...

was the greater miracle. Until Next Time, Love You Much!

 

What are your intentions?

Not too long ago a situation happened where my circle and I were enjoying each other’s company. So much so that we decided to spread joy with others via social media.  We were met with so many positive comments and praises.  Others too started captioning their day with their circle as well.  It was a great day.  The very next day we were met with a single critique that wasn’t positive, or helpful either (sometimes you will get a critique that though it doesn’t feel good to the ears, it is for the up building of you and your future but this wasn’t it).  Immediately some in our circle thought that we should remove the video from social media all because of this one comment.  At that moment I had to take in consideration the circles feelings about the video but also the reasoning behind their feelings.  Was this a hindsight moment or was this all because one person did not like it?

Have you ever gotten dressed and felt really good about your appearance?  Not only did you like how you looked that day, but you were told all day by dozens of people that you looked AMAZING! They loved the color of the ensemble and the fit of it as well.  You stepped high up until one person, JUST ONE, says to you “ok now you better pull back from the table, because that shirt is looking a little snug.’ IMMEDIATELY every compliment you heard that day became a distant memory.  Though the other critiques were so positive, you find yourself checking your body image in the mirror and eating only half of your lunch because you have put yourself on an instant diet. This is something that we allow to happen far too often in our lives.  We allow the negative words of others feed into us so much more than the positive.  This is THE SCARY POWER OF NEGATIVE WORDS!!!

Have you ever looked at someone and gave an OPINION about something that (1) You weren’t asked about and (2) Did not uplift or help the outcome of the situation at hand?  Let me help you out. The answer is YES!  We all have at one point or another. Never was our intentions to deflate the person, but ask yourself, “How many times have my words been the cause of someone’s negative critique of themselves?”  Let’s stop empowering others with our negative words and uplift them with our positive ones.  As I stated before, not all critiques feel good, but make sure its coming from a place to help one grow.  Before you decide to give your opinion or before you decide to accept the opinion of others, ask yourself what is the intent behind it.......UNTIL NEXT TIME! Ciao for now!

CONSISTENTLY CONSISTENT

Hello loves!! I pray 2019 has been as amazing to you, as it has been for me thus far.  It has truly been eye opening and I must say...I haven't liked everything my eyes have been opened to but as I have learned, you can't correct what you will not confront!  

I woke up this morning feeling fearless and a little adventurous.......I got on the scale!!!  I avoid that thing like the plague, but today I needed to know if weight-loss was the result of my hard work and dedication. IT WAS!!  I was so excited!  I reminded myself in that moment that as long as I am consistent, the result will continue to show.  I became so motivated to do better and to be better.  I made my grocery list and committed to eating exactly what I purchased. No deterring from the plan!  I was quite proud of this declaration. I had been pressing through for months now and had plateaued in a big way. I was so proud of the number that came across the scale that I told myself, "Kenyetta you did that girl!  All that hard work is starting to pay off.  Now, when you feel like quitting, remember this moment and think of the end result.....A better, healthier YOU!"  I also thought that if I could stay consistent in my weight-loss journey on the days that were tough, on the days where I just didn't want to go to the gym, and on the days when I got on the scale and it moved in the wrong direction, then why couldn't I stay consistent in other areas of my life?

So many times I would create a budget for myself and do well for a few weeks.  I would stay out of certain stores.  I would unsubscribe from different email distro list to resist temptation.  I even would take credit cards out of my wallet so I wouldn't get the urge to shop.  This would work for months even! AND THEN....Semi-Annual sales would appear, or a dress that was $300 would go on sale for $75!!! I mean who could resist that?!  I would tell myself that I was doing good to get it at that price and this ONE time I could let go!  This would lead to new purses being purchased and new shoes being shipped to my home. So much so that the two closets in my room is NOT enough for my wardrobe.  Why?!!  Because I didn't tell myself that just because its a sale, doesn't mean its a sale for me!! Bottom line....I DIDN'T STAY CONSISTENT WITH MY COMMITMENT!!! 

We do so well in the beginning to whatever we commit to.  Whether it's budgeting, jobs, blogging, or even relationships. We make the decision to follow a specific guideline, while verbally declaring how we are "ALL IN."  What happens is, we are so proud of the work we do that we get comfortable in thinking that we have this commitment down to a science.  That we don't need to be "ON" at all times, when that is the furthest thing from the truth.  It's almost like the person who takes medicine to control an illness.   Each day they take the medicine like clockwork; never forgetting.  Some are so committed that they even take it at the same time each day.  The meds begin to do its job and somewhere we feel we are cured because after all we feel amazing!  Never do we associate the "amazing" feeling to the consistent use of the medicine, but rather how we feel in the moment.  We don't take in consideration that if we aren't consistent with use, that the illness could return and return even worse than before.

With anything we commit to, know this:   It can be tedious, taxing, and even boring at times.  You may not even see the fruits of your labor for a while, but just remember why you committed in the first place and the end-result you desire to see.  Nothing worth having comes easy! In consistence lies the VICTORY!!! Until next time! Ciao for now!

Rise To The Occasion

Greetings Beautiful Souls

Oh, how I have missed you!  It has been quite a bit of time since I have last been on my blog.  No excuse other than I have had to renew my mind.  I had to come to a point where I said to myself that I had something to say and it was worth listening to.  And guess what…. I HAVE SOMETHING TO SAY! This entry came about while working out with a good friend of mine.  Here goes……

I have a friend that I work out with from time to time when I want to be a little lax in my regimen and converse.  When we do work out, he focuses on weight training more so than cardio, so the treadmill was a bit of a struggle for him.  A few weeks pass and I decide to call him up and sure enough he was willing to meet me at the gym to catch up.  We go and of course we weight train as usual, and then go to the treadmills to finish up.  We pick two treadmills next to each other and commence to “getting it.”  We start with a 3-minute warm-up of about 3mph and then increase from there.  Each time one of us increase, the other does as well until finally I notice that he is so fluid on the treadmill that he has surpassed me.  For the past three weeks, he has been dedicating more time to his cardio and it showed! I’m getting winded and my legs are starting to cramp so I say, “Slow down, I can barely keep up!”  Continuing with his jog he looks over and says “So you want me to decrease my speed so you can feel better?  Why should I have to revert back to a level I have mastered just to make you feel comfortable with where you are at?  You better push yourself and come up to my level girl!” And continues at his current pace! This jars me.  Enough so, that I muster up every bit of strength I have and finish my three miles faster than I have ever done before.  All because he did not back down, but pushed me to another level of excellence.

I remember times in my life where I chose not to “shine” because I did not want others to feel like I was trying to make them feel inferior or that I thought I was superior.  There have been times where I knew I could do better and I knew to do better but I didn’t because I needed for others to be okay with where they were at.  The problem with that is I wasn’t being authentic to myself or a motivator to others.  By not rising to the occasion I told people that it’s okay to stay complacent/stagnated and that progression is underrated.  Had my friend backed down and ran at a pace that was suitable for me, I would have never picked up the pace and still be running at the level I had been for months now. I would have been so fine with the pace because after all, at least I was exercising, right? WRONG!  Because I was not changing it up, I would eventually plateau and weight loss would be no more!  Just like in life!  If you continue to go at whatever you desire with the same energy that you have been putting in, then you will eventually bottom out, things will not progress, and because you are not seeing change you will quit! If you want different, then you will have to do different.

I know this is easier said than done, but trust me, IT IS POSSIBLE! If it does feel like a task beyond your scope, then you need to find a circle that will motivate you and not congratulate your lack of effort.  And motivators, be just that!!! MOTIVATE! Don’t revert back thinking that you are helping them. You are hurting not only their chances for success but yours as well.  Eagles always soar above the rest!  The question is, are you an Eagle or are you a Crow?!  Do you fly with others to be a part of the crowd or are you willing to soar alone?  Sometimes it is lonely at the top, so pull someone with you instead of stepping down!  NEVER allow the loneliness of the next level make you revert back to the previous one!  Until next time! Ciao for now!