Exposed to Grow

Greetings Beautiful Souls,

I was on a girls trip in Punta Cana, on my way to the spa, when I noticed something that stopped me mid-stride. A gentleman was high up in a coconut tree, chopping down these huge leaves. No ladder. No harness. No visible support system of any kind — just him, the trunk, and a machete. I sat there in awe. I mean, genuinely impressed.

Then I noticed what the leaves were covering.

Each time he chopped one down, a coconut was exposed. And these coconuts were green — not the golden-brown ones you picture when someone hands you a fresh coconut with a straw in it. I remember thinking, “I don’t want that coconut water. Nothing about that looks refreshing.” And then it hit me: that’s exactly why he was cutting the leaves away. Not to make the tree look tidy. Not because the leaves were in his way. He was clearing them so the sun could reach the coconuts and ripen them.

That’s when the Holy Spirit spoke.

Sometimes we can’t grow. We can’t evolve. And it’s not because something is wrong with us — it’s because we haven’t been exposed to the things that would push us there. Heat. Storms. Exposure. The very things we spend our lives trying to avoid, cover up, or shade ourselves from are sometimes the exact things standing between us and our ripening.

Think about that green coconut. Shaded, protected, covered by leaves — and still not ready. Not because it lacked potential, but because it lacked exposure. We do this to ourselves constantly. We stay under the leaves. We avoid the heat. We call it self-care, we call it protecting our peace, and sometimes it is exactly that. But sometimes — if we’re honest — it’s avoidance wearing peace as a disguise. We shade ourselves from the very conditions God intended to use to mature us.

I think about the seasons in my own life where I resisted the heat. Where I prayed for the storm to pass instead of asking what it was there to produce. I wanted the version of me on the other side of growth without ever agreeing to the process that gets you there. But ripening doesn’t happen in the shade. It happens in exposure.

James 1:2-4 tells us to count it all joy when we fall into various trials, because the testing of our faith produces patience, and patience has to have her perfect work so that we can be entire, lacking nothing. Not despite the trial. Through it.

So let me ask you what the Holy Spirit asked me that day: What leaves are you still hiding under? What’s the storm you’ve been praying away that might actually be the very thing assigned to ripen you? You cannot mature in the shade and be upset that you’re still green.

Let the sun reach you. Let the heat do what it’s supposed to do. You weren’t made to stay covered forever — you were made to ripen.

Until next time!

Praying For Those Who Prey

 When God Told Me to Pray for the Person Who Preyed on Me

 

Have you ever felt like God was asking too much?

Not "love your neighbor" too much. I'm talking about "pray for the person who intentionally tried to destroy your name" too much. Because I have.

 

There was a season when my family and I were walking through one of the hardest chapters of our lives. We were already carrying enough. We were grieving. Fighting battles people couldn't see. Trying to simply survive. Then someone decided that wasn't enough. They lied. They gossiped. They twisted the truth. They spoke on situations they knew absolutely nothing about. And somehow, the lies spread faster than the truth ever could.

 

I was hurt….NO... I was angry!

The kind of angry where your mind starts drafting responses before your feet even hit the floor in the morning. The hurt that has you pulling up screenshots of previous messages set to you and pulling pictures as well to humiliate…….. I was choosing violence. So, I did what a lot of us do when we're wounded.

I took it to social media. SMH! I KNOW I KNOW!

 

I didn't say everything I wanted to say because trust me... there was plenty left unsaid. But I said enough to let people know I had been wronged. Then conviction came.

That still, small voice wouldn't let me rest. I deleted the post.

 

I thought that was the lesson.

 

I was wrong.

 

The next morning, before the sun even had a chance to rise, the Holy Spirit woke me up with one clear instruction:

"Pray for them." Excuse me... what? Pray for... them? The person lying? The person gossiping? The person trying to dismantle my family's reputation while we were already bleeding? Surely You meant, "Pray that they stop."

Or maybe, "Pray that I expose them."

Or perhaps, "Pray that justice comes quickly."

 

No. Just... "Pray."

 

Can I be honest? I felt like God was playing in my face. I sat there crying.

Real tears. Not because I didn't know prayer worked... But because I didn't want it to work for them. Everything inside of me wanted accountability.

God wanted intercession. Those are not the same thing.

So I prayed. Not because I felt spiritual. Not because I suddenly liked them. Not because they apologized. I prayed because obedience mattered more than my feelings.

 

At first my prayers were short. Forced. Sometimes all I could manage was,

"Lord... bless them." Then I'd stop because my flesh wanted to argue with my own prayer. But day after day... Morning after morning...God kept calling me back.

Eventually I found myself praying for their peace.

Their healing, Their family, Their purpose, Their relationship with God. THAT BLESSINGS WOULD RUN THEM DOWN!

 

Somewhere in the middle of praying for them...

God started healing me.

That's what shocked me.

I thought the assignment was about changing them.

It was actually about freeing me.

Because bitterness is expensive.

It costs peace.

It costs sleep.

It costs joy.

It costs intimacy with God.

And the enemy doesn't care whether you're holding unforgiveness because you were right. He just wants you holding it. I also learned something else. There is a difference between people who pray...and people who become intercessors. Anyone can pray for people they love. Intercessors pray for people who wounded them.

 

Jesus prayed,

"Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do."

Stephen prayed while they were literally killing him.

THAT’S KINGDOM.

It's uncomfortable.

It's costly.

And if I'm honest...

It feels unfair. But the cross wasn't fair either…..

 

Today, I don't tell this story because I'm proud of how I handled it.

I tell it because I'm grateful God loved me enough to interrupt my flesh before my flesh interrupted my purpose. Sometimes God will ask you to pray for the very person who preyed on you. Not because they deserve it. But because your calling is bigger than your offense.

 

DO NOT MISUNDERSTAND ME……

Praying for someone doesn't mean you trust them again.

It doesn't mean you give them access again.

It doesn't mean there are no consequences.

Forgiveness doesn't erase wisdom.

You can release someone spiritually while maintaining healthy boundaries naturally.

Those two things can coexist.

 

Looking back, I realize God wasn't asking me to ignore what happened.

He was asking me not to become what happened. Because hurt people often become people who hurt people. But healed people become people who heal people.

So, if God ever wakes you up in the middle of the night and tells you to pray for someone who preyed on you...Don't be surprised if your tears become the very water He uses to grow something beautiful inside of you. It won't be easy.

You may even feel like He's playing in your face. But one day you'll realize He wasn't punishing you. He was protecting your heart.

 

And that...

was the greater miracle. Until Next Time, Love You Much!