NO RERUNS!!!!!!

 

 

There was a professor who told a joke and once he got to the punch line, the entire room burst into laughter.  Two minutes later the same man tells the joke again and there were a few chuckles.  One minute later the man tells the SAME joke and no one laughs but instead says, "you told this twice already, we can't keep laughing at the same joke."  In turn, the professor says "True, so why do you keep crying over the SAME problem?!"

  

That struck a chord inside of me!!!!!! WHY DO WE DWELL, MOAN, AND CRY OVER THE SAME PROBLEM?!   I can only speak for myself, but on more than one occasion I have gone through things in my life where I re-played it over again only to dig myself further into a "pity party."

 

As long as I can remember, I have never liked listening to the same story told more than once, I don't like reruns on television, nor do I like left over meals from the night before.  As a Gemini, I get bored easily with the same routine and need to spice it up every now and then. I guess this is why it struck such a chord!  I thought to myself "Why oh why do you replay tragedies in your life and cry over them as if they just happened, when you are the one who can't stand RE-RUNS of any kind!!!"

 

We are the first ones to tell someone to get over something, move on, and do something that would make them happy, but when it is actually time to take our own advice, we clam up and wait for the next shoe to drop (so to speak).   I Peter 5:7 tells us to "cast your cares upon Him, for he cares for you." We can't keep re-playing tragedies in our lives hoping that we can come up with a new ending to something that has ALREADY HAPPENED!!! This is ridiculous! We should actually give it to God who welcomes all our problems, but instead we wear it like a coat. Complaining to anyone who will listen. Crying and all the while asking God to help us move on, but the whole time we refuse to let the situation go! Why?!  Because a little part of us revels in the heartache because it has been with us for so long. 

 



 

Love yourself enough to let go of heartache, stress, migraines, and tear soaked pillows.  Love yourself enough to embrace the wrongs that have been done to you, own them, and let them go so you can hold on to something so much more desirable. Hold on to the many laughs that have occurred.  Hold on to your loved ones who have been there (regardless of the situation). Hold on to the TRUE friends God has placed in your life. REPLAY the good in life.  Whatever it is that makes you smile, HOLD ON TO IT!!!!  For your sake, turn the channel to the Re-Runs of your life and look at something new, something bold, something GREAT!  Until next time loves, Ciao for now!

 







Behind My Smile!

Seems like every time I turn around I find myself being so transparent that it almost scares me. I start second guessing what I put down. Saying to myself, "people are going to think you are totally mixed up, no one goes through this much stuff, you need to get yourself together!" Well I have come to find out that this is my way of doing that. My therapeutic release so-to-speak!

For months, I have been in a quiet rage. My family has been through so much this year that if I didn't know any better I would say that we were Job reincarnated (BTW you should really read the book of Job it is an interesting read).  I would get up each morning say my prayers, get ready for work, awake my children, pack my lunch, speak affirmations with my girls and then we leave out to our destinations!  After leaving work I would go to the gym (burn myself out), go pick up my girls, cook, help with homework/chores, pick out clothes for the next day and then we would look at TV or chat.  This was my daily routine, give or take shopping with the girls or dinner with friends. 

Never would I discuss my feelings or allow myself to cry at all anymore (I attributed this emotion to the weak-minded; oh how wrong I was). I would keep myself busy but not in the sense that it was productive.  I would grab Kinsley and Kayla and shop or go to dinner, or even go to the gym so I could HIT something!  Never did I do things around the house (dust was everywhere, smh), but lay in my bed like a hermit. In my mind though I was totally okay!!! I was just in bed because I was "tired." 

The thing about denial is that you truly do lie enough to yourself til it feels like the truth, but your body knows that it isn't.  Yesterday I woke up with the worst headache.  It was blinding almost.  I felt like I had been hit with a 2x4 in the back of the head.  Later that day I was talking with my sister and a shooting pain goes through my left arm.  I immediately got concerned but because I'm a "soldier" I toughed through it.  My father called me later that day and told me his spiritual diagnosis (which was totally right).  He said, "baby you need to deal with reality! Grieve your losses, deal with the aftermath, and acknowledge your emotions. If not then stress is going to kill you!"

He couldn't have been so right!  I have been shielding myself from hurt and tunnel-visioning myself through this past year.  I guess I said all of that, to say this:  Things are going to happen in your life and you burying your head in the sand, will not allow it to go away.  Face your situations head on, and fight for your life like a "soldier."  Heal your hurts, and blossom your relationships with the people that care for you.  Ignore the people that don't (especially if they don't affect your everyday life or if their lives are far from perfect). Keep your relationship growing with God.  He knows all about you, so learn more about Him! Love you all.....mean it!  Ciao for now!